10 Skills of Competent Parents

What makes a good parent? There are 10 competencies that predict good parenting outcomes, parent-child bonds and children’s happiness, health and success.

What Makes a Good Parent? by Robert Epstein, Scientific American reports:

  • Decades of research reveal 10 essential parenting skill sets. A new study of 2,000 parents determined which skills are most important to bringing up healthy, happy and successful kids.
  • Giving love and affection tops the list. Then comes a surprise: managing stress and having a good relationship with the other parent are more helpful than some child-focused behaviors.
  • All types of people are equally competent at child-rearing—and anyone can learn how to be a better parent with a little effort.

These 10, listed in order from most to least important, predict a strong parent-child bond and children’s happiness, health, and success:

  1. Love and affection.  “You support and accept the child, are physically affectionate, and spend quality one-on-one time together.”
  2. Stress Management.  “You take steps to reduce stress for yourself and your child, practice relaxation techniques, and promote positive interpretations of events.”
  3. Relationship skills.  “You maintain a healthy relationship with your spouse, significant other, or co-parent and model effective relationship skills with others.”
  4. Autonomy and Independence.  “You treat your child with respect and encourage him or her to become self-sufficient and self-reliant.”
  5. Education and learning.  “You promote and model learning and provide educational opportunities for your child.”
  6. Life skills.  “You provide for your child, have a steady income, and plan for the future.”
  7. Behavior management.  “You make extensive use of positive reinforcement and punish only when other methods of managing behavior have failed.”
  8. Health.  “You model a healthy lifestyle and good habits, such as regular exercise and proper nutrition.”
  9. Religion.  “You support spiritual or religious development and participate in spiritual or religious activities.”
  10. Safety.  “You take precautions to protect your child and maintain awareness of the child’s activities and friends.”

credits: https://www.leelanauchildrenscenter.org/98/articles-and-reading/10-skills-of-competent-parents


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